A Cry For Help -- Brittany Spears Style

We no longer take pictures of our child. Here is one from the vaults -- a classic. He is doing fabulous. However, we have decided it is time to stop the insanity and break him from the nuk. His momma read in one of her modern parenting magazines about how to perpetrate such a scheme on your child by snipping off the end of the nuks with a scissors. He pops the nuk into his mouth and immediately takes it out in disgust. He is onto our game and pretty mad about the situation from time to time but overall the transition is going well.

We learned one important lesson when we had our painting party at our old house in Hudson -- DON'T TAP THE KEG UNTIL AFTER THE PAINTING IS TOTALLY DONE. Drips and runs increase exponentially with alcohol. I should have known better. I will be extra careful not to make the same mistake again. We are having a painting party this coming weekend, March 3 & 4. I will be there day and night now through Saturday morning trying to get the whole thing taped and primed and ready for paint. Saturday and or Sunday, anytime, any help would be greatly appreciated. Elegant snacks consisting of caffeinated beverages, Oroe cookies, Doritos, possibly some artichoke dip and what not will be provided; Beer and whiskey served upon completion of a days work. The ol' lady is all over me to get this house finished up. Help a brother out. Did I mention the snacks and Old Milwaukee tall boys?

Below are our custom mortise and tenon stairs as Ike looks on. SWEET!

This is my garage - taped and sanded, eleven foot ceilings, in-floor heat, Andersen windows, welding recepticle. I already have a pin-up calender for decoration and planning purposes. Sweet Moses, I'm living the dream. I guess technically I won't be living the dream until it has garage doors and openers installed. Oh well, close enough for me.

Did anyone hear the street scuttle about that Anna Nicole Smith? I heard she had a baby in the Bahamas.

I Shot the Short Guy From Hall & Oates

Here are four beautiful generations of Johnson boys under one roof celebrating Grandpa Walt's 90th Birthday party. This was right before the dancing girls showed up.

Henry with Grandpa Bruce and Grandma Sue.

Here is Henry doing stuff in my garage. Henry has really taken to putting stuff on his head. Here he is wearing my old hardhat from the old days as a laborer. You can see the door I'm supposed to be staining in the background and the clawfoot tub I'm supposed to be refinishing in the background. I'm workin' on it.

When we were in Las Vegas we went to a shooting range where you can shoot machine guns. One of the fun parts about that is you get to pick out a target to shoot up. My question is whether the guy from Hall & Oates knows that there is a company that makes shooting targets bearing his likeness. Nice moustache.

Some of you already checked this out on YouTube - Here is a link to a video of Henry "helping" us learn the sex of baby #2.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mbdwzGdtZoM

Play Dates, Wrestling Masks, Midgets, Sign Language & and a Cliffhanger Regarding the Sex of Baby #2

Henry had a play date with Baby Gracie last night. You can check out baby Gracie's blog BABYHEAD. It is not quite as elegant as Henry's blog, but I'm not here to judge. While you're at it, you could also check out Baby Elsa's blog, LIVE! FROM WYOMING, MN. Our posse of friends and associates all decided to have babies at the same time.

Despite the chaos of home construction going on, I was able to sneak out of town to Las Vegas last weekend with my brother. We went to some rock 'n' roll concerts and drank much beer. I also saw a latino midget dressed up as a leprechan - one of the highlights of the trip. Below is a photo of one of the bands. Note the ski masks - all the happenin' west coast bands wear ski masks or wrestling masks on stage and many have dancing girls on stage. This phenomenon is sorely lacking in the midwest.

These guys didn't wear masks but they make up for it by being the only band that I know of besides Spinal Tap that has more than one bass player. They need that extra bass. This is Deadbolt.

Henry's communication skills are developing very rapidly. He is always talking and babbling. He can understand most of the stuff we say to him and he usually tries to reply even if he doesn't make any sense at all. Here is a link to a video of Henry staking out the fridge for some milk. We no longer have to guess if he is hungry or thirsty. Sometimes I like to mess with him and make him say please three or four times before I give him anything just because it's cute.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XEu5NgZcdXI

Things with the house are moving along nicely. The plumber, electrician, and heating guys are mostly done. We have stairs going to the basement and our garage slab was poured this past Tuesday.

Baby #2 is also moving along nicely. We had an ultrasound done last Monday and everything is allegedly normal. With Henry we opted not to find out the sex so we would have a fun surprise on the birthday. This tim we decided to have the nurse lady write down the sex of the baby and put it in an envelope if we decided we wanted to find out what it was. Well, we were unable to handle the suspense and immediately opened the envelope when we got home. I will make the official announcement after the immediate family gets the word. However, I will reveal that we were able to rule out a hermaphrodite! Our blessed lives continue.