Details...

Just a quick post since I seem to be getting so lazy with this thing lately. We have been doing lots of fun stuff -- too much to document.

The kids went to the Como Zoo a while ago -- I think it's a Minnesota rite of passage to have your picture taken with the monkey statue.

The big news is that Henry starts part-time summer pre-school TODAY! I swear he was just a wee lad not too long ago and now he's all growed ups.

Here are some pictures from houseboating with my brother and his family...

Violet is fluent in english. She can bang out a complete sentence from time to time if you ask the right question. We should be transitioning to a toddler bed soon.

I think Henry is a southpaw but maybe ambidexterous like his grandpa. He is writing/drawing left and throwing with both hands still. His drawing skills have reached a new plateau -- advancing beyond simple "stick people". He was drawing with cousin Eli on the houseboat a few weekends back and told us he had to add some "details" he called them. It turns out "details" is his code word for weiners. I asked him what he would do if he could do anything for his birthday and he said he wanted to cruise in the houseboat and draw pictures with "details" witcousin Eli. I couldn't help but think of a scene from the film SuperBad.

Glitter Vests, etc.

This is the entire Johnson Posse so far -- Henry, Eli, Zoie, Jada & Violet. When we all get together they basically keep themselves entertained.

Say Violet, Mrs. Roper is on the phone and she wants her wardrobe back.

Violet has her baby totally potty-trained. Now that Mama is home for the summer I'm sure that Violet will somehow get it figured out pretty soon as well. Meanwhile, Violet's baby uses about twice as much toilet paper as the rest of the family combined.

Henry performed a few numbers in his highly anticipated dance recital and really delivered the thunder. I'm not sure what the future holds for my son as a song and dance man but he looks cute as all get out in his red glitter vest. Below, Henry poses with his cousin and fellow dancer Jada.

Henry and I are now working on a one act, two man reinterpretation of The Glass Menagerie. It's still in the development phase --we haven't decided if we are going to go with puppets or what. Stay tuned...

I *finally* have my little boat trailer roadworthy after a couple of years of non-use and just have one little part that I need for the motor. Meanwhile, I can putz around on the little lakes around here using the oars. Henry and I took out my boat for the first time last weekend. We had a couple bites but didn't catch anything. Henry had a really good time. When we had supper that night he told mama "Me and Dad only have one rule on the boat -- we don't have to say excuse me when we burp!" This was a little funnier considering when we left momma told me to make sure and teach him all the safety rules and whatnot.

It's really obvious that he loves the one on one time when we get it.

Violet's Birthday, The Chicken Massacre of '09,& Other Ramblings...

Violet is two. Everyone asks where does the time go and so do I. We celebrated her birthday last weekend with some family and friends. She got a whole bunch of awesome new stuff. I took the occasion as a reason to buy a new Weber grill. Below, Baby Lila demonstrates her obviously sophisticated tastes.

For her second birthday, Violet had a Dora cake and some Dora balloons. She is big into the Dora scene.

Elsa and Gracie enjoy the party...

Violet was a perfect sweetheart for her birthday. She knows how to put on her game face for company.

Here is an impromptu shot of Gracie and Violet-- as she ponders another year in the books. I guess we caught Violet in deep thought.Henry talked momma into buying a stuffed animal. It is a puppy and he calls it Spot. He has been accumulating stuffed animals at an alarming rate. He is the preschool equivalent of one of those weird old ladies that you hear about on the news with a trailer house filled with one hundred and seventy cats. I think his heart is in the right place though.

We had a minor catastrophe with the chickens. The neighbor's dog ate and or maimed seven of our chickens. I think we have six hens and a rooster left. A couple of the survivors have some battle scars from the Chicken Massacre of '09. The remaining rooster we have taken to calling Bubble Gum since his wing was chewed up so bad. They all seem to be pretty well recovered. I thought it would be in everyone's best interest to get my remaining chickens an enclosed run so they could enjoy the outdoors with some sense of security. The minute I had the run enclosed, Henry had shimmied through the little door and claimed it as his new home. Somehow, he coaxed Violet close enough to the hole and yanked her through.

I'm not sure if it's a good thing or bad thing, but Henry always seems to be dragging along a chicken with him outside. A couple days back I was trying to round them up and one was missing. I thought we may have another casualty until I realized Henry had stuffed a chicken into a plastic crate in the sand box. I believe I saved that chickens life.


More family fun...

I guess it's a good way to keep track of them.

Grandma Judy gave Violet an old doll crib as a birthday gift and both of the kids seem to get a kick out of playing in it.

Henry performed a few dance numbers with his troupe in an open practice session as a treat for Mother's during Mother's Day week and as a sneak preview to the big dance recital next weekend. Below, Henry accepts a medal for achievements and excellence in dance. Henry has an obvious sense of rhythm and the ability to improvise on the dancefloor. I don't recall if I've mentioned to my readership that I had one year of formal breakdance training back in the mid-80s, for what that is worth.

For my birthday, me and momma took Henry to his first Twins game. For the most part things went pretty good. However, next time I try to take a young one to a game I would opt for a matinee game instead of an evening game. It just so happened we had four super drunk college age kids that were unable to manage drinking a beer without significant spillage. I think they may have also managed to teach Henry a new word or two. The breaking point ended up being the guy right in front of us almost getting charged with a hate crime. A young asian fellow who ambled by with a footlong hotdog was having trouble locating his seat when the guy in front of us made a snide comment. Basically, they ended up nose to nose and yelling "F-You" at each other for about two minutes straight. That was around the fourth inning. Henry was starting to get antsy anyways so we called it a day.

Henry is now a big fan of cotton candy.

At least Henry will be able to say he saw a game in the old Dome. Here we are at Gate H.

Sometimes we use time-outs to discipline the kids. Violet has actually gotten to the point where she will put herself in time-out if she knows she has been misbehaving and sometimes she will put herself in the time-out chair if she is really upset. We were confused the first time it happened but just kinda went with it.

In the picture above, she has her purse. Her favorite thing to carry around in her purse is a handful of rocks from the driveway and a pair of sunglasses. I like that she keeps it simple.

I'm not sure what to say about this picture. Violet was just in a goofy mood and was taking of clothes and putting on jackets and glasses and hats. I guess I like the posture.

Violet has gotten into the habit of taking off her diaper at night. Most of the time she ends up with soaked sheets. Amazingly, the other morning she woke us up in the morning with screams and she was nude in her crib but it was totally dry. Momma put a diaper on her which she quickly saturated with pee to the point of soaking through to her pants. Maybe she is ready for potty training.

Fairmont or Bust / Busted in Fairmont

We recently went to beautiful Fairmont, Minnesota to visit Henry and Violet's great grandma Dina, who is recovering from a stroke. We drove down with Grandma Judy. We rolled five deep in the Honda Accord with Grandma Judy flanked by car seats on both sides. There were no major meltdowns on the way down. Our pit stop at the Dairy Queen in LeSeuer may have been our saving grace. It was a Brazier.

There was some of this...

And some of this...

Dina was in great spirits for our visit and Henry and Violet wasted no time in challenging her to a wheelchair race down the hall. I honestly don't remember who won.

We stayed at the Holiday Inn and it is the most exotic vacation we have yet to take as a family.

Violet thoroughly enjoyed herself in the pool.

There were only a handful of near death experiences in the kiddie pool under my watchful eye.

This was bedtime -- after I returned from dropping of Grandma Judy at Dina and George's house. I was given a ticket on the way back to the hotel for failure to display current registration and failure to provide proof of insurance. I was unaware that it was my duty to keep current vehicle tabs on the wife's vehicle and we had been driving with expired tabs for about five months. And I didn't know where the proof of insurance was. We were able to get that dropped. Anyhow, I wasn't about to let the stiff arm of the law ruin our exotic vacation.

Violet was pretty excited for Easter.


She quickly got the hang of the Easter Egg Hunt...

And was on an unadulterated sugar high for at least the next six hours. She ate all candy as fast as she could find it. She may have look disinterested and aloof but she has several peanut butter cups in her mouth in the photo below.

Henry got the hang of things pretty well too...


Living with a three and a half year old continues to be a never ending source of amusement and aggravation. The things that come out of Henry's mouth can astound and befuddle me all at the same time. Henry and I have been working on fixing the Subaru without success. I think it might be a lost cause. I have been unable to re-thread the spark plug that blew out a couple weeks back. The other day, I was working on the car and Henry was crawling around under the hood randomly hitting things with a ball-peen hammer. I was getting nowhere with what I was trying to accomplish when Henry turned to me and said matter-of-factly "Dad, this is pretty tough. We better do a high-five when we're done." He really comes through with some gems when I need them the most.

Henry is totally potty trained except that we normally have him wear a diaper at night. Lately, if we feel confident that he hasn't had to much to drink and went pee before bed we will just let him wear the big boy undies to bed. It didn't work out so hot one night. It must have been about 5:30AM or so when momma and I woke up to Henry's angry and confused screaming.

"WHO POURED WATER ALL OVER ME IN MY BED?!"

"WHY DID SOMEONE PUT WATER IN MY BED?!"

"MY CLOTHES AND BED ARE WET!! WHY?!"

He was screaming, hysterical and inconsolable for at least five minutes. I think momma and I had to try pretty hard not to bust out in giggles while tending to his emotional needs. It seemed to fall in line with his current stage.

Henry had an absolutely brilliant idea the other day. I'm just going to go ahead and put it out there. He was running around naked and I was trying to convince him to get dressed. I told him to put his underwear on and he said he wished that there were pants with built-in underwear like swim trunks. It blew me away. I waste at least twenty seconds ALMOST EVERY DAY putting on underwear and I'm guessing some people take even longer. He obviously has the mind of a truth seeker and pragmatist.

Henry was eating out of a box of Teddy Grahams the other day and pointed to a recipe for a smoothie on the box -- a container of yogurt, some applesauce, ice cubes, and a handful of Teddy Grahams. Not bad. He now calls it a "swirlie".

AREA YOUTH STABS SELF IN EYEBALL WITH BUTTER KNIFE, NOT KIDDING...

I really should be updating a little more frequently to keep up with current events. To say the past few weeks have been a roller coaster ride for the Johnson Family would be more than a modest understatement.

I guess the thing that sticks out most in my mind is that earlier this week Henry STABBED HIMSELF... IN THE EYEBALL... WITH A BUTTER KNIFE! None of that is an exaggeration. I was outside feeding the chickens and whatnot and came inside to see find my momma tending to our son with an eyeball wound. Apparently he was trying to cut an apple with his little butter knife and somehow he ended up stabbing his eyeball. Momma and I discussed a plan of action. I said let's wait it out and maybe put some frozen peas on it. Then they went to the ER. The doc gave him some ointment and said if it had been a quarter inch toward the business parts of his eye he would have been in serious trouble.

The photo doesn't really do it justice. If you look at it close up you can see the stab wound.

A wood whittler will always tell you rule #1 is to whittle away from your body. I guess the same logic applies to cutting up apples with a butter knife and you're never to young for that advice.

We refinanced our mortgage which is was pretty sweet, but then a couple days later I got a letter in the mail from the IRS! Not so sweet. My accountant goofed up on our 2008 tax return and it turns out we owe an extra thousand bucks. Oops. He said he'd cover the $56 dollars in penalties and interest though so I just have to cover the thousand dollars. Thanks buddy. The best part was when I got back in my car from the post office I opened the letter from the IRS and said a few swear words and threw it aside and started my trusty '92 Subaru Legacy (223,XXX miles) and it let out a REALLY loud bang. I thought the motor finally blew up. Turns out a spark plug just came unthreaded and shot out when I started it. I've been expecting the car to blow up for at least three years or so. I sometimes honestly can go a month of commuting without seeing a crappier vehicle on the freeway and I have also seen people openly snickering at me for what I can only guess is the general appearance of the old Subaru. It is so badly rusted that some of the body panels actually flap in the breeze as I amble down the freeway. Despite the lack of aerodynamics, the car routinely tops 35 mpg.

The children enjoyed their tradition of decorating Easter eggs over at Grandma Judy's.

Basically everything Violet does is adorable. Including this.

Last year Henry ended up crushing most of his Easter eggs because he would sit on them and roost. He has matured quite a bit since then.

Best Quote of the past few weeks: "Daddy, could you maybe get me a band-aid? I have blood leaking out of my body." Do you want Sponge Bob or Spidey?

This was a couple weeks ago -- Henry prancing around in my safety glasses that I stole from an old, old shop teacher at a middle school in Minneapolis back in the mid 90s. There must be some irony there somewhere.

Violet is totally off the nuks and we have basically banished sippy cups from the house. The nuk thing was a breeze. We did the same deal as we did with Henry -- snipped the ends off of some nuks. She quickly lost interest. The sippy cup situation affected both of them and has been kind of annoying with all the spills. On a random note: Henry is a staunch sweatpants enthusiast. He is Mr. Sweatpants. He says he likes them because they are soft and denim is to hard and crunchy on his body. One more note: He got his costume for his upcoming dance recital -- a red glitter vest!

I can now say from experience that having chickens in a kiddie pool in your basement for one month is enough to try a man's tolerances and thresholds. From what I have read, it is still a little early in these parts to be putting chicks outside in the coop but I put a heat lamp out there and they seem to be doing just fine. We found our chicken coop on craigslist. It is awesome. We haven't decided if we are going to leave it with it's rustic finish or paint it red and white like a barn. I kinda like it the way it is.



I still have to fence in a little run for them and tend to a few other things. The neighbor is setting me up with some free chicken feed in exchange for some eggs. I love the barter system.

Look at the guy in the back. He looks angry.

I actually bought this watering can right after we closed on our land knowing pretty well that at some point in the near future I would have some chickens. It took about three years or so.

White Rock Chicks!

I bought 15 baby chicks a week ago. They are White Rocks -- a variety of Plymouth Rocks. They are good for eating or laying eggs. We are going to butcher the roosters in about 12 weeks and keep six or so hens for laying eggs. I found them on Craigslist. Before I bought them I had scribbled down a note that said "20 WHITE ROCK CHICKS -- $30 -- HINCKLEY" followed by a phone number. I left the note on the counter and my wife saw it and said "What the hell is this? Are you going to some stripper party at the casino?" I had to explain a little.

So now we have some chickens in the basement. They are super cute and the kids love 'em. I can tell you this -- chickens grow fast. The little buggers have already tripled in size.

Once in a great while the planets align and we have a moment like this...

About once a week we have a moment like this... Roller skates, Transformer mask, Hulk smash hands, and a baby chick -- Uncle Sam is a pretty good sport.

Henry is a nasty old pirate. I wish he would respect the no shoes in the house policy though.

Vince and Drama are enjoying the onset of spring.

Whenever Henry tries to get his way he has a go-to phrases -- "Daddy, TRUST my plan!" I'm not quite sure how he came up with it. But it usually goes something like this:

Henry: Daddy, can I have a big ol' glass of chocolate milk?

Dad: Um, we're gonna eat in like ten minutes. Can't you wait? Maybe you should ask mom.

Henry: Daddy, just TRUST my plan!

I have finally recovered enough from the emotional and physical trauma from building our house to where I have started a few small projects around the house. Henry is very interested in helping me. He is very curious about my tools and helping me carry stuff and doing anything he can to be a part of the action. I finally put some cabinets in the laundry room for mama and put some pine tongue and groove paneling on the ceiling from the stash I had left over from building the house. A little bit of trim work and the laundry room will be totally done. I bought treads and risers for the stairs going to the basement to replace the temporary ones. Henry helped me sand prep them for installation. Henry will stay on task for a half hour to an hour depending on the situation. I wouldn't quite say he's earning his keep yet but his natural curiosity and desire to help out is pretty cute...

Mama got a new camera and has been getting lots of cute pictures of the kids.

Violet has been sporting a Bill Murray/ Caddy Shack look lately. She is at a fun developmental phase where she is starting to use language to communicate. Sometimes she will just start shrieking and stomping and we'll have to tell her to take out her nuk and use words and she will take out her nuk and tell us what is going on. I would say three word sentences are about tops but she can almost always get her message across. One of her new catch phrases is "GO AWAY!" She uses it basically anytime something displeases her.

Violet is way more affectionate than Henry ever was. With Henry, he would very rarely wrap his arms around us for a hug or rest his head on our shoulder if we were holding him unless he was super sick or something. Violet is the opposite of that. If I'm laying on the couch she will crawl up and lay on me and if I'm heading out the door or dropping her off at daycare she will say "daddy, kiss... hug!" Now that Henry is three and a half and grown up he will always hug and kiss me when I come home or leave.

Probably the Most I Will Ever Mention Squeegeeing...

It is utterly mind-blowing how grown up Henry is. He started taking showers. He still usually takes baths but this is all happening too fast. He takes special pride in mastering the mandatory post-shower squeegeeing of the shower door. Monitoring the squeegee situation reminded me of the Sienfeld episode regarding good naked vs. bad naked. Squeegeeing a shower door falls into the latter category.

The other thing is that he totally mocks me. He will run off and put on some of my clothes or shoes or socks or whatever and then stomp around yelling "OH, I'M JERE! I'M DADDY!" I just love that he can already bust my chops and already finds me to be mockable and ridiculous. Below he is mocking me and flexing his muscles for the camera all at the same time. (Note: I bought the "Johnson" stocking cap at a thrift storeto be ironic since my last name is Johnson and all. I don't think I have gone a day wearing it without being approached by an excited St. Paul Johnson Alumni.)

For some reason it is high comedy for both of the kids to put on my grotty athletic socks.

Possibly the best Henry quote ever: "Dad, don't look at me for two minutes -- I'm going to do something dangerous."

Close second: "Dad, you freak me out." He told me this because I picked out an outfit for him that offended his sensibilities.

Violet loves getting dressed in her winter gear but doesn't always like getting out of her jam-jams and into her regular clothes for the morning. Violet is the least lactose intolerant person I know in the world. I think she could knock down a gallon of milk and a 5 lb. block of cheese if we let her. Her attitude is starting to show. She will sometimes try to hit when she doesn't get her way. We still love her despite the violence.

Daddy is a Loser

Henry loves to climb on the railings.

Henry waking up in the middle of the night and coming downstairs to sleep on the floor in our room had basically become an every night thing and was starting to take it's toll on mama and I. To top it off, usually he would wake up again at about three or four o'clock and weasel his way into our bed. We decided it was time to stop the insanity and regain control of our nights. The situation took about three or four nights to get under control but now he sleeps through the night in his own bed. One of nights during that transition he was having a crying fit and I told him that he had to stay up in his room and tough it out like a big boy. He was crying hysterically and started saying "Daddy is a leeeewwwwsssssserrrrrrrr... Da-daddy iss a lewwwwwssserrrr".

Violet and Henry can be very sweet and playful together but Henry knows how to push her buttons and it can turn into...

this pretty quick.

We were out of sippy cups so Henry had a little bedtime sip of milk from a shot glass.

I'm 70% sure Violet is a genius. She can count to five and can say the alphabet and she can yell at our dog and tell him to get in the mudroom when he get unruly or too gassy.

One morning Henry came into our bedroom and I was still in bed. He had a DVD case in his hand and asked me "Dad, is this movie appropriate for kids?" The movie in question was Redneck Zombies.

Henry scolded me for talking to him while he was coming down the stairs. He said "Dad, don't talk to me. I am trying to focus on the stairs right now."

Just a Little off the Top?

Somehow, we got the idea that Henry needed a haircut. It was getting a little shaggy. Normally, we just take him to Poik's and that's it. But we decided that in these economic times that maybe a good way to save $12 every three months would be to do the haircuts ourselves. I volunteered my barber services for this experimental procedure. Momma quickly realized it was an event that needed to be documented for a number of reasons and grabbed the camera.

Back in the late 1980s, I used to shave lightning bolts and such into the heads of friends in the name fashion and team spirit, so I figured I was up to the task. Besides, I had seen this done many, many times. I know that people who cut hair for a living kinda hold the hair in between their fingers and cut uniform lengths off. See below? I thought I had it. Apparently, there's more to it than that. I now know that I lack the patience and vision of a barber or hairstylist. Henry isn't even four yet and he realized that this whole operation was SNAFU from the beginning...

It wasn't long before I resorted to the clippers.

By this time my I was basically in sheep shearing mode -- just hold him down and get it done. At this moment Henry wasn't thinking about his new glow in the dark Spiderman undies...

For less than the price of a twelve pack of Pabst Blue Ribbon YOU can prevent this abomination of decency. Donate NOW to the Henry James Hair Fund.

We told him he looked really awesome but he was self conscious about it -- enough so that he refused to take of his stocking cap for dance class. He seems to have adjusted to now. And he takes pride in that he now looks like a ringer for his cousin Eli.

Henry is like a little marauding bear in the kitchen pantry. He has an uncanny ability to nose out unhealthy snacks. I swear we do dress the kids every day.

We got this beautiful little rocking horse from Great Grandma Evi. Both of the kids have already taken a liking to it. Violet rides it like a cute toddler would. Henry rides it like a rented mule.

Violet had her 18 month checkup a few weeks ago. She tipped the scales at 25.02 pounds (52%) and is 35 inches tall (99%). I don't recall her exact head circumference measurement but it was 74%. She now wears a men's size 9 sneaker. Just kidding about the last part but she is growing so fast. Overall, it appears that she is destined to be a tall and skinny knockout with a slightly larger than average head circumference... just like her momma. Violet and momma enjoy painting their toenails and doing facial masks.

Violet's vocabulary is growing so fast. She says "baba boo" for Grandpa Bruce. She is also learning to climb onto the dining room chairs and stools in the kitchen.

I finally found Violet a nice outfit from a thrift store ($10 at Unique Thrift on Rice and Larpentuer). It's insulated and really ornate. A little bit more than I would normally spend on a kids outfit but I thought it was ok. This one is called "Crouching Tiger".

Since she started wearing her new outfit she has learned to avoid Henry's quick sword strikes with simple, efficient movements and mind power.

Dad was gone last week on the annual spearing / ice fishing trip (34 below!). Henry took over as man of the house and slept on the threshold of our bedroom to protect momma from intruders.

Fists of Fury & The Gift of Beard

The weekend before Christmas we has three family Christmas get-togethers. The weather was super crappy and traffic was even worse. But it was nice to get all the travelling out of the way so we could stay local and relax a bit more over the next week. Henry and Violet were, of course, super spoiled and got like a bazillion presents from everyone.

Henry checks out a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles kit he was given from Uncle Sam. It included a mask, sword and throwing stars. Note: My thick and luxurious beard.

I spent the past month cultivating a beard which was converted to a moustache immediately after Christmas. It was an amazing odyssey but I have since shaved. I am open to comments and what have you regarding the different facial hair scenarios.

Question: What is the only thing better than getting a pair of Hulk Smash Hands for Christmas?

Answer: Getting two pair.

In the true spirit of Christmas, we all took turns beating the crap out of each other with our new Hulk Smash Hands.

Below, my wicked left jab renders Henry temporarily dazed as his neck snaps back from the sheer force of the blow.

We posed for a family photo at Jesse and Brandi's.

Note to parents: I have learned that you can't trust a three-year-old alone with a fresh roll of tape or a new tube of toothpaste. Henry looks like a mutant cross between Ted Kennedy and the older brother from E.T. with his crazy tape face.

This is my son.

Violet loves Dora.

Over the past month we had convinced Henry that we maintain direct contact with Santa. Whenever Henry started acting turdy, I would pick up the phone and say, "I'm sorry Henry, but I am gonna have to call Santa and tell him about your extreme behavior". I even called a couple of times using a Redd Foxx-type voice and pretended to be Santa. We had Henry walking a pretty straight for most of December using deception and skullduggery.

But we did let them have Reese's Pieces for breakfast Christmas morning that were left in their stockings from Santa. Violet is still pretty jazzed about her new Dora slippers. Footie Jammies!

Violet and I practice our high kicks as we enjoy a snack of croutons.

Violet also got a keyboard from Santa. She can already play Home Sweet Home by Motley Crue.

Violet was given a little cottage playhouse with an oven and a bunch of kitchen stuff. She is also now the proud parent to THREE Cabbage Patch Kids. She tucks two of them in at night in a box and sleeps with one of them. Here is Violet flashing some gang signs.

Violet and Papa...
Me and Henry also managed to get out with Uncle Jesse and do a little darkhouse spearing... We even got one after a couple hours on Sunday afternoon. I learned Henry has an insatiable appetite for chocolate milk. He was relatively well behaved but almost fell in the spear hole once.

He passed out about 30 seconds after I got him in the truck...

Pretty Darn Festive

This would be our second annual family photo at Sandgren's Tree Farm. Same as last year, we met my brother and his family (minus Zoie) to find a tree. Last year we went with a HUGE fir tree. This year we went with a modest white pine and it went really smooth. No fuss, no muss. No swearing, no chainsaws in the house. Easy peasy, Patrick Sweezy.

Henry and Eli try to haul a tree.

Me & Jesse haul our trees and Brandi hauls Jada and Violet.

After last years monstrosity of a tree, this little guy was a welcome change. Big trees are a total pain -- hard to get through the door, hard to set up, no good.

Violet seems to be going through a phase where she hates to wear clothes. I've been kind of impressed that she has the dexterity to get totally undressed. Her new nickname is "Nudity Jones". Hopefully, it doesn't stick.

Festive and more lady-like...

Here is the tree all decorated. Is Violet not huge? Does she not look almost the size of Henry in this photo?

Violet is saying new words everyday. She has a few two word sentences. We look at picture books with her and she can identify a bunch of stuff when prompted. Tonight, we were having dinner and she looked around and yelled "DADDY, MOMMY, HENNY!" She will sing in the rhythm of the ABC's but make up different sounds. Every once in while she will hit a vowel on time.

Henry continues to dazzle us with his artistic abilities and his mastery of all forms of dance. This morning, he wanted to take the yellow dishwashing gloves, the bottle washer thingie, and a pan scrubber to daycare as toys. I said no. Henry is also very interested in helping out in the kitchen. He is excited to learn how to make stuff. He helped mama make cookies last week and learned how to make a pot of coffee (sort of).

A few nights back he busted his lip open pretty good from jumping on the bed. He smashed into Violet's head and he bled all over.

No goat casualties. They seem to be enjoying their new house and doing very well overall. Dolly and Kenny continue to gain acceptance from Drama and Vince. It's tricky sometimes but at the end of the day it seems like they are all on the same team. I think next spring the obvious next step is to buy an intact male goat and let Dolly start a family.

Turkey Day & Chicken Feet

This was our second year hosting Thanksgiving. The turkey situation went much smoother this year but I would say there is still room for improvement. I proudly donned late Grandma Pauline's apron while carving up the turkey.

For over two years we have been enjoying movies and our favorite programs on a modest twelve inch TV set. Since we were hosting for Thanksgiving, I came up with the brilliant idea to make a TV upgrade. I'm only half joking when I say that upgrading to a 40" Sony LCD HDTV 1080p was the most meaningful experience in my life since the birth of my children. It's pretty sweet. Although sometimes the Hi-Def aspect is a bit over the top and John Madden in HD is downright hideous. Below is a picture of our actual TV -- Brad Pitt on Access Hollywood.

Chicken Feet! Sometimes I think that Henry is a natural comedic genius. He came up with this all on his own. He steals momma's yellow dishwashing gloves from under the sink, puts them on his feet and runs around and yells "CHICKEN FEET! I GOT CHICKEN FEET!"

We enjoyed a very fun and relaxing four day Thanksgiving weekend. It was just the right mix of family time and lazing about and chopping and stacking firewood. We really didn't even have to leave the house except for a brief trip to Target for some early Christmas shoppin'. We got Henry the Bat Cave. So don't get Henry a Bat Cave. Momma wanted to take the relaxation factor up a notch and give Henry and Dad facial masks. I'd like to say that it wasn't quite as gay as it sounds. I would like to, but I cannot.

Violet insisted on updating her fall wardrobe with a few key pieces.

Violet is surprisingly able at kicking stuff. This picture is not magic, nor smoke and mirrors. It is my daughter kicking a ball with skill and dexterity.

Here is a pretty cute one of Momma & Violet...

The Henry James Quote Machine...

Henry was on the toilet last night exorcising some demons when he yelled "Hey mama, you gotta check this out. This is NOT cool."

That's always alarming to hear from a three year old who has sequestered himself in the bathroom for about ten minutes.

He had a little bout of the runs. Poor guy.

Lightning in a Bottle

We recently bought a new tabletop radio / ipod dock for the kitchen. This has lead to a dance revolution in our house. Henry often feels compelled to remove his shirt while dancing. Here is forty-seven seconds of lightning in a bottle as Henry does a free form dance to Hasil Adkins "Chicken Walk". A couple minutes after this film was taken Henry had to abruptly be put in time out as he delivered a savage heart punch to Violet as she innocently ambled by. He incorporates a lot of kung fu and elaborate hand movement to his dance steps and I guess he just got carried away.

Momma bought the kids some costumes on clearance after Halloween...

Grandma Judy babysat the kids overnight so we could head up to Duluth for a wedding. Here's momma looking ravishing in her new Steve Madden Moon Boots.

Here's momma with her posse -- The Raging Unicorns.

Is this Beth McDonough's breakfast buffet or was it our table at the wedding? Hmmmm...

Tim & myself sharing a candid moment after one and a half glasses of chardonnay.

Violet goes for the new "Baglady Chic" look that is all the rage.

Greetings From America's Dairyland!

Oy. Got a little behind there... Time to catch up.

We took our first family road trip with both kids a few weeks ago to visit our friends Stacey & Jeremy in Madison. We were a little anxious about bringing both kids on a long trip and trying to mix in kid fun and adult fun but everything went really smooth and we had a really good time. The drive out there kind of went like this...

For some reason I busted out laughing every time I looked back at Violet sleeping with her little lips and double chin.

We stopped in Menomonie to look at a couple of our college houses and be nostalgic. Then it was off to Madison. For a long freeway drive you can't beat the scenery and rolling farm land of Central Wisconsin. One of the highlights of our visit was the farmer's market in Madison -- the largest in the country. It stretches for blocks around the state capital.

We took a brief tour of the capital building and I can tell you that Henry urinated all over the pristine marble tile floor of the state capital. All in a day's work for this young chap...

Mmmmm.... Donuts...

They pretty much have everything that you could possibly imagine there and a whole lot more, including a respectable contingent of street musicians. I won't even get into the cheese thing but I will just say that they have that covered too. We came home with a variety of cheeses, a big ole' thingie of brussel sprouts the size of a small Christmas tree, and two sixers of a Madison micro brew -- Hopalicious it's called.

We also went to Ella's Deli & Ice Cream Parlor ,which may be the best restaurant in the world for three year olds. You might just have to check out the website. They have a whole bunch of animated and motorized displays of superheroes and miscellaneous kid's stuff made of paper mache that go back and forth on trolley lines across the ceiling. There is a Beatles diorama and a tribute to the Green Bay Packers. Most of the tables had glass tops with stuff underneath like Pez dispensers and baseball cards -- that kind of stuff. The chocolate malts were elegant, although I was disappointed that they didn't give you the little extra left over in the metal cup which is customary elsewhere. I wish you could see the ceilings... Here's Violet. The woman can flat out eat. I had a cherry coke and an open-faced Reuben sandwich that was both challenging and delightful all at once.

But the kicker was the carousel. Here's mama and Violet.

Mama was flabbergasted that I let Henry have his own horse and judging from the look on Henry's face, I think he was surprised also. Jeremy looks on as I hold Henry's had for balance and reassurance purposes.

Henry has dance class with Grandma Sue on Tuesdays. The Tuesday before Halloween was an open house for the parents and the kids were urged to wear their costumes. The night was filled with comedy both intentional and unintentional. Unfortunately, the pictures turned out a bit dark. I don't recall the exact name of the maneuver. However, below is a photo of Henry in mid-stride mastering a complicated step in his soft ballet shoes and Batman costume.


Henry mugs for the camera as Grandma Sue puts the class through the paces...

Henry had to be separated from this guy once because they are total trouble makers when they sit next to each other. Below, they discuss dance and general skulduggery.

Halloween night - We gave the kids some festive cupcakes. It seems like a post a picture like this about every two weeks. The messy eating pictures never get old.

One day a couple weeks back I had a day of a bunch of driving around out to St. Joseph and over to East Jesus and back so I decided to take Henry along with me so he could get a feel for the gig and spend a day with his pa like old times. On the way back to the office from St. Joseph we were able to stop and see Great Grandma Evi for a while for a cup of coffee and a visit. Henry and I decided to wear matching business attire which amused my wife to no end. It was a business casual revolution.

Here is the assembled cousin posse on Halloween. We drove out to our folks places and then out to a nearby subdivision for trick or treating.

This guy was really festive about Halloween and had his yard all tricked out stuff. He offered me and my brother a beer, which was thoughtful. Henry got all amped up on suckers.

Here is Henry with cousin Jada...

We don't really use the baby gate anymore. Violet has subsequently mastered the stairs and now walks up the stairs with her ultra long body using the railing like a big girl... She must be having a little growth spurt because everyone has been commenting on what a huge beast she is.